Parting Shots
This blog is read mostly by people I work with (who have already heard this joke multiple times), but I'll try to give a brief overview before getting right to the punchline. This will also give me a chance to over-explain a joke, which I think only makes it funnier. I'll warn you now that most people will find it pretty tasteless (although tame by my standards).

You can skip this if you know what foosball, stuffed shots, and facials are. We have a foosball table at work. It's a great deal of fun and a very nice stress reliever. Now, in foosball, when the goalie has the ball (typically after blocking a shot) they try to clear it past the opposing offense. Sometimes, the opposing offense manages to get in the way and shoot the ball back into the goal. Some people call this a stuffed shot. We happen to call it a facial around these parts. Now, if you're being clean minded you can imagine that the phrase comes from something like a volleyball term used when you spike the ball into the opposing player's face. (You can learn more about fun and exciting volleyball terms here. If you're not clean minded you can find a couple of alternate definitions over on Urban Dictionary. Good old Matt, who is leaving us, happens to hand out facials of the foosball variety on a regular basis.

Next we have the home run derby. This is where a pitcher throws easy pitches to a batter who then tries to hit a home run. It's a fun little contest to see who could hit more home runs if they got their ideal pitch.

And finally, we have my idea for Matt's going away thingee. He gets on the foosball table and repeatedly tries to clear the ball from his goalie in a very slow manner (right in front of the goal). The rest of his coworkers line up and take turns stuffing the shot, also known as giving him a facial. I call it foos-kake (after the particularly un-appetizing concept of bukake.

Enjoy.
- posted by Robert @ 10/12/2005 11:20:00 AM